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What They've Thought
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What They Thought Occtober 31, 2004 R.A.
Hawkins Click here for columnist bios |
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R.A.
Hawkins What a collection of clowns we have for this week’s show of “Guiding Blight” available on the Communist Broadcasting System. IAEA Director Muhammad el-Baradei: Agitprop director extraordinaire for the third world collective brain drain known as the UN. Rather: Purveyor of fraudulent documents and scary stories for the dull of wit, whose integrity can be summarized with a quote easily attributable to him. “Yes I am aware of the fact that this is a counterfeit twenty dollar bill. But I think it’s still worth twenty dollars don’t you?” The Unholy Trinity (James Glanz, William J. Broad and David E. Sanger) of the New York Times, aka UHT who, in the interest of fairness, apple baklava and the Afghani way, travel time to get the oldest story possible. Muhammad: “Uh, yeah, Dan?” Rather: “How may I help the empire, sir? Always at your service.” Muhammad: “We need a little agitprop work from you so we can win this election. The third world is getting worried that they no longer have a say in American politics anymore. By the way, thanks for not mentioning that embarrassing food for oil scandal. They almost got us until the media slapped a lid on that.” Rather: “Anything I can do to help the cause.” Muhammad: “We want to re-release that old story about the explosives being gone from that bunker in Iraq.” Rather: “If we bring that up, it will come out that the ones who helped them move everything were the Russians. The American people will also realize that if they were able to move all of that, then they probably also moved the WMDs. Not to mention the fact that they might also realize that all of that was moved while Bush was wasting his time trying to get you people off the ruble and backing your own resolutions. They also might remember that story was reported in April of 2003. What if they realize those are the explosives used in nukes? It will be hard to deny Iraq wasn’t a problem in the making.” Muhammad: “No, they won’t. The American people aren’t that smart anymore. Quit giving them so much credit. Kerry doesn’t, so why should you? Most of the people you graduate over there can’t really read. What makes you think they have the ability to reason anything through?” Rather: “I can’t do it because they’re all watching me these days. But I can hand it off to the Unholy Trinity. I’ll give them a call. Just send me the particulars in a fax. I might be able to coordinate this with the Kerry campaign.” Muhammad: “Good. We don’t want Kerry to lose this election because there might be a civil war.” Rather: “Don’t worry. As long as the Kerry Edwards ticket wins there won’t be any riots over here. Mrs. Edwards said so.” Muhammad (sigh):“That’s the point. You pass it on to the Unholy Trinity and we in the UN can stand back and look surprised. I think we might make a speech about watching the Sudan closer and maybe forming a committee because the Muslim extremists are still winning the war there. If the tide turns against them, we will have to ask for immediate American intervention, however.” Rather: “Is it that bad in the Sudan?” Muhammad: “It’s a real hoot, kind of a Roman redo. I’ll have to make a note of that for when we control the world. We can get back to the good ol' lions and Christians games again. You just run along and call the unholy ones.” Rather: “Is that some more of that boring history stuff? I hate that.” Muhammad: (click, buzzzzzz) Rather reaches across the desk in his self-important manner and grabs the red phone. Rather: “Yes. I need the Unholy Trinity. Yes, you can put me on the speaker phone.” He rolls his eyes because they have one of those and he doesn’t. He absent-mindedly pulls the fax out of the machine and reads it while he waits for the full trinity to gather. He notices something written on the bottom of the paper and realizes it isn’t in English. Knowing that he might want to retain one bit of the story for himself he cuts it off and runs the remains through a copier. UHT: “How may we help the cause?” Rather: “Muhammad wants you to re-run the missing explosives story.” UHT: “James was going to write a series on the constitutional right to abortion to support Kerry’s attempt to save the Constitution. William was going to write one on the Al Qaeda threat video even though it might occur to the people that if the only thing they can do is make threats at this juncture, then Bush is doing a good job. David was going to write one on a goat herder in Afghanistan who has lost his opium income and his wife left him after voting for the first time in her life. Without the extra income he can’t buy a new wife. He really misses the Taliban. We thought it would provide an economic twist that the American proletariat could relate to. We can’t talk about the economy here since it is doing better than it was under Clinton. I’m not sure we can squeeze your story in.” Rather: “Muhammad isn’t giving you a choice. This is an order.” UHT: “We just got them off of the fax machine. How do we know this is real and not a forgery?” Rather: “I’m giving you my word.” UHT: “That’s
good enough for us. I think we can fit your story in if we all work
on it together. We’ve had it sitting around since we got it last
year just in case we got the go ahead from Muhammad. Is there anything
else you need from us?” UHT: “Oh, that’s Latin. All it means is: In the good old days, children like you were left to perish on windswept crags. Aaaaaaaand cut… Yes there were a few time warps in the story, but we’re talking about liberals here. The recycled story is one that I wrote about at the start of the war. Russian ties are showing yet again in this Iraq debacle. We have the UN telling the media what to do by giving them information so they can affect the outcome of the election. No matter how this election goes, it is time to exact punishment on the United Nations, CBS and the New York Times along with any who helped them.Yes, I mean politicians too. If you want to take
your country back it is absotively necessary to undo the corrupt influences
in this country. All of this talk about Clinton going for President
of the UN is silly. We are on the Security Council and that ground rules
out an American holding that position. Kerry is dumb enough to get us
off that council in order to have the Clintons off of his back. Anything
for power. R.A. Hawkins Web Site Contact Back to Top |
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Bets are being laid, political jockeys are vying for cabinet positions, and the political stalls are filling up with manure as we reach the last corner of our election stretch. Who really runs these political derbies? Is it the lobbyist organizations, the political jockeys, or the nominee nags? With all the media spin, sometimes you can't tell the back end of the horse from the front end of the political spinning machines. The manure of lies is creeping up the Democrat's presidential nominee quicker than the stable boys can throw it out. Pretty soon, the smell of foot rot will come wafting from the Kerry and Edwards leftist barn stall, but will the Bush haters just pinch their noses and say it smells like roses? John Kerry has dug his pit of manure so far down that his flip-flops are stuck in the muck. What Kerry really needs is to be put out to pasture with all his old Vietnam days of rhetoric; and his wife, Theresa, needs to have a bridle placed in her mouth so her tongue can be controlled. Why would anyone want to bet on an old nag to lead them into winning when all the old horse has done is alienate all those supporting his win? Kerry/Edwards have done nothing but bash our coalition of 70 countries that have been helping us with this war on terror. In every debate, Kerry and Edwards stomp their feet and trot around like southern thoroughbreds. They whinny, "We need a global test, we need to bring in other countries, we've been giving all and..." Whoa there, boy! The truth of the matter is that all Kerry and Edwards have done is alienate those nations who are standing with us in this global war on terror. If Kerry and Edwards were to take the largest stall in America (The White House), how would they rebuild all the damage they've done with their mantra "wrong war, wrong place, wrong time?" Who's going to jockey for whom when all they do is take all the credit for the dying and the monies spent on our global war on terror? Do you really think Britain, Australia, Italy, Iraq, and others are going to lay their bets down with the likes of two old trench-mouth geldings? Once the coalition of sacrificial believers have had these two mules kick and bite them one too many times, I seriously doubt you'll find them backing Kerry/Edwards in this race against global terror. To smell how deep John Kerry's and his stable boys have gotten, let's look at some of the inaccurate statements Kerry has claimed in his debates: Kerry Falsely Claimed He Had "Made A Mistake In How" He Talked About His Vote Against The $87 Billion, Despite Previously Saying It Would Be "Irresponsible" To Vote Against Funding For Our Troops. (CBS' "Face The Nation," 9/14/03) Kerry Claimed He's "Never, Ever" Used Word "Lying" In Reference To President Bush On Iraq, But In December 2003 Kerry Told A New Hampshire Editorial Board Bush "Lied" About Reasons For Going To War In Iraq And In September 2003 Kerry Said Bush Administration "Lied" And "Misled." (Patrick Healy, "Kerry Camp Lowers NH Expectations Behind In Polls, Senator Now Seeks Spot In 'Top Two,'" The Boston Globe, 12/8/03; Sen. John Kerry Campaign Event, Claremont, NH, 9/20/03) According To FactCheck.Org, Kerry's "Cost" For The Iraq War Is Off By $80 Billion. ("Distortions And Misstatements At First Presidential Debate," FactCheck.org, 10/1/04, According To FactCheck.Org, Kerry "Overstated The Case" On Osama Bin Laden's Alleged Escape At Tora Bora. ("Distortions And Misstatements At First Presidential Debate," FactCheck.org, 10/1/04) Kerry said U.S. forces allowed Osama bin Laden to escape in 2001 during the battle at Tora Bora in Afghanistan because the administration "outsourced" fighting to Afghan "warlords." Actually, it's never been clear whether bin Laden actually was at Tora Bora. It is true that military leaders strongly suspected bin Laden was there, and it is also true that the Pentagon relied heavily on Afghan forces to take on much of the fighting at Tora Bora in an effort to reduce US casualties. But Kerry overstates the case by stating flatly that "we had him surrounded." Kerry Made Assumption The UN Was Willing To Continue Sanctions Against Iraq Despite The Fact They Were Becoming "Increasingly Unpopular With Key Nations." (Glenn Kessler and Walter Pincus, "Few Factual Errors, But Truth Got Stretched At Times," The Washington Post, 10/1/04) Kerry Misspoke And Said Weapons Of Mass Destruction Were "Crossing The (Iraq) Border Every Single Day." "The AP noted that Kerry misspoke when he said 'we got weapons of mass destruction crossing the (Iraq) border every single day, and they're blowing people up.' Kerry meant terrorists were crossing the border, not nuclear weapons." ("Distortions and Misstatements at First Presidential Debate," FactCheck.org, 10/1/04) Kerry Claimed U.S. Soldiers Are "90 Percent Of The Casualties In Iraq," But The Wall Street Journal Puts U.S. Casualties Closer To 50% When You Include Iraqis Helping To Secure Their Own Country. (Editorial, "Our Kerry Iraq Guide," The Wall Street Journal, 9/30/04) Kerry Falsely Claimed President Bush Diverted Forces From Afghanistan To Iraq; Gen. Tommy Franks Said It's "Absolutely Incorrect" That Resources Were Diverted From Afghanistan. (General Tommy Franks, ABC Radio's "The Sean Hannity Show," 9/21/04) Kerry Falsely Claimed The Bush Administration Has Not Organized An International Summit To Discuss Iraq. "Reality Check: The administration has, in fact, organized just such a conference, in consultation with Iraqi and other Arab allies. It will be held in Cairo late in November, with the foreign ministers of the G8 countries (i.e. including antiwar countries such as France, Germany, and Russia), China; the countries of the Arab League, Turkey and Iran invited to attend. If it goes ahead, it will mark the most significant attempt to forge a political consensus on Iraq since the war." (Tony Karon, "Reality Check: John Kerry," Time.com, 10/1/04) Kerry Misleadingly Claimed He Can Bring More Allies Into Iraq. "Reality Check: It wasn't the President's credibility that kept most of the international community out of Iraq; it was, and is, the policies pursued by the U.S. in Iraq. But Kerry is broadly committed to the same policies. And if, as he says, other countries will participate because they have a stake in the outcome, the presumably they would do so no matter who was President of the United States." (Tony Karon, "Reality Check: John Kerry," Time.com, 10/1/04) These are only but a few piles of manure Kerry and his democrat stall boys are letting pile up deeper and deeper. The trouble is, in these final days of America's political derby will the far left continue to douse their lying stench with James Carvel-type spin? Will CBS, ABC, NBC, and other various news organizations really do any investigative reporting and expose these manure filled leftist stalls of crap? Or will all of the mainstream media organizations continue to buzz around like flies at the Kerry/Edwards stall? Will they continue to insatiably devour the deceitful and harmful bacteria and then regurgitate it back onto the American public? Let us hope that truth, honesty, and unwavering beliefs will be what America really sees in November when she goes to the voting polls. This political derby we are running here in America is the one that will either have us continuing to live in freedom or it will be the one that drags us down into the dying breed of old nags. Do we really need stalls filled with piles of wet, smelly horse manure and the socialistic ways of those who believe in doom and gloom? On voting day, let's send the old ideals of Kerry/Edwards and the far left out to pasture. I don't think the old mules would make good glue—they don't know how to stick to anything for more than five seconds. Dog food wouldn't be right either—dogs shouldn't have to eat rotten, smelly, tough old meat. Let their ideals fade along with their rhetoric. Honor them for their time of service, but for heaven's sake let's take them out of our country's derby permanently. Kerry L. Marsala Web Site Contact Back to Top |
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It’s often said that baseball is a metaphor for life. I’m not sure if this has ever been broken down scientifically. I guess I’ve just always assumed that the base path is supposed to represent life’s journey, with first, second, and third base representing youth, middle age, and retirement, respectively. This would explain why you start at home plate and spend the rest of the game trying to return there; you slide through the dirt because that’s what you do when you die. And who cares if you get dirty, really? In the end, all that matters is whether you do what you set out to do. That’s one theory, at least. But then again, when people say baseball’s a metaphor for life, it could also just be that life—like baseball—boils down to staying up late to watch the Yankees drop Game 7 of the American League Championship Series to Satan’s minions (who, in this politically correct era, prefer to be called the Boston Red Sox). That’s a theory I came up with last Wednesday, when I… well, stayed up late to watch the Yankees drop Game 7 of the American League Championship Series to Satan’s minions (I’m sorry, the Boston Red Sox). That’s when I found myself asking the existential questions that’ve plagued mankind for centuries. “Who am I?” “Why am I here?” “What am I doing up after midnight?” “How the hell is this Yankee baseball?” I’m still not sure which theory to ascribe to. They both make sense. You know, it’s not an easy time to be a Yankee fan. In fact, I’m not sure it’s ever been harder—not even during the ‘80s when they were New York’s second best team. People are calling their loss in this year’s ALCS the biggest collapse in baseball history. And I suppose they have a point. A few days earlier—on Saturday night—the Yanks took a 3-0 series lead after trouncing the Red Sox, 19 to 8. Things were looking up. No team had ever lost a seven game series after winning the first three. I remember thinking that evening how bittersweet a Yankee sweep would be; to look forward to this series all year, and to have it end so anti-climactically, sort of felt like getting Mr. Potato Head for Christmas, with a lump of coal instead of a potato. But there was only so much sympathy for the devil in my house. The Yankees were going to win. And I was going to enjoy it. Then something happened. Three outs from extinction the following evening, the Red Sox turned everything upside down in Game 4. They beat the Yanks, broke their spirit, and never looked back at the mess they’d left behind. Then they won Game 5. And then they won Game 6. The next thing you knew, the series was tied 3-3. And it ended anti-climactically, all right, just not in the way I’d expected: Boston took the field unopposed last Wednesday evening, easily winning Game 7 by a score of 10 to 3. The Yankees’ uniforms were empty. Their souls had gone home for the winter. And another year had gone down the drain. I suppose I should’ve been stunned by the Yankees’ poor Game 7 performance, but I wasn’t. I’ve seen Yankee championship teams before. Those teams made the impossible possible. They had that little something extra that can’t be defined by a fantasy baseball stat. These Red Sox have it, but the Yankees no longer do. So Game 7 wasn’t the clincher here; Game 4 was. Boston’s victory was in the Cards, so to speak, from the moment David Ortiz set foot on home plate in the 12th on Sunday. The only thing that shocked me was the fact that I saw it coming. I’m a Yankee fan, after all. And Yankee fans never expect defeat. What a strange reversal of roles. Back in 1920, Boston was baseball’s winningest team, and New York hadn’t won a single title. Then something happened: Boston sent George Herman Ruth to New York for a fistful of cash and a ghost to be named later. New York went on to win 26 championships; Boston hasn’t won one since. This is the so-called Curse of the Bambino. It is the world of sports’ ultimate urban legend. It’s cult-like. Fans of both teams define themselves by it. And so the teams are defined by it, too. The Bronx faithful, for our part, play the role of true believers. We’ve developed a blind faith in the Yankees. Except it isn’t quite blind. It’s backed up by empirical facts. We expect the Yankees to field the best teams, to beat up on Boston, and to do the impossible at least eight times a year. But why do we expect this? Because those are the things the Yankees do. New York has made a name for itself by being better than everyone else—in life and in baseball, for better as well as for worse. But it’s not about putting others down. It’s about lifting yourself up. New York is the most important city in the most important country in the world. If you can make it here, you can make it anywhere. But you’ve got to believe in yourself before anyone else will believe in you. That’s why we believe in our baseball team. Yogi Berra once said, “It ain’t over till it’s over,” and the Yankees, like Yankee fans, live and die by that advice. On the other end of the spectrum, you have Red Sox fans. Red Sox fans are whipping boys. Their hearts have been broken more times than Michael Jackson’s nose. If these people had given up on baseball altogether after 1986, no one would’ve blamed them. “That’s all right, Boston. You go home and get some rest now. You gave it your best shot.” Back then, they knew their best shot wasn’t good enough. They knew it before ‘86 and they’ve known it every year since. The reason they’ve never given up is because this heartbreak defines their relationship with the Red Sox. They will become different people—and their team a different team—when the championship drought is over. You see, for Boston, it’s not about winning. No. In fact, it’s all about losing. It’s about the beauty of the struggle. And that doesn’t mean they don’t want to win. They do. And they’ll cheer like mad when it happens. But in a way, they will mourn the loss of a friend. Of course, it’s easy to say this as a Yankee fan. And I’m sure many Red Sox fans will disagree with me. But the point I’m trying to make here is that their championship drought was never about Babe Ruth’s ghost. It was about the self-doubting demon they needed to face inside. When the Yankees signed Alex Rodriguez last winter, Boston led the bitch-and-moan brigade, going so far as to say they needed a salary cap to compete with their rivals. But the Yankees’ success was never about their bottomless bank account. They won four championships between ‘95 and 2000 because they were a well-oiled machine on every level, from the players and coaches straight down to the hot dog vendors and fans. I’m no fan of teamwork for teamwork’s sake; I believe “working together” is pointless when the people you work with suck. But all the same, baseball’s a team sport, and the late ‘90s Yankees were a real team. Nowadays, they just throw money at their problems. They’re a bunch of dots that no one can connect—the fact that Yankee fans like me stopped believing in them proves it. Boston didn’t need a salary cap to beat the Yankees this year. They didn’t need to lift the Curse of the Bambino, either. Luck is a secular religion. To believe in a curse suggests little faith amongst the faithful. What they needed, quite frankly, was to believe in themselves. They needed to believe they could address Yankee weaknesses better than the Yankees. And they needed to believe that nothing, not even A-Rod in pinstripes, could stop them from doing what they set out to do. And so they did it. They reversed the roles for the first time in nearly a hundred years. Suddenly they were the ones who beat their archrivals by simply believing that history was on their side. As much as I hate to say it, we could all learn a lot from these Red Sox. A day after Game 7 last week, MSNBC informed me that, as a Yankee fan, I shouldn’t try having sex anytime soon. This is because fans of losing teams experience a drop in testosterone. I also learned that evening—via Primetime Live—that 33 percent of Democrats have faked orgasms, as opposed to only 26 percent of Republicans. I’m not sure what any of this means. I’m not even sure it means anything at all. But in a roundabout way, it brings us back to the issue up top. Sometimes we define ourselves by the company we keep. Sometimes it’s the other way around. And while some of us say there’s no “I” in “TEAM,” others point out that there’s a “ME.” But whoever you are, and whatever the case may be, we all have our own Curse of the Bambino—each and every one of us. And maybe for you it’s a boss or a teacher. Maybe it’s poverty, bad eyesight, or a bad attitude. Maybe it’s none of these things. Maybe it’s all of them. Or maybe your Curse of the Bambino is the Curse of the Bambino itself. Whatever. The point is, baseball isn’t a perfect metaphor for life, but if nothing else it teaches us this: If a man can hit a round ball with a round bat and send it sailing 500 feet through the air, just about anything is possible. Except maybe a Cubs World Series. Jonathan David Morris Web Site Contact Back to Top |
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According to Hans F. Sennholz in his essay Saving the Dollar from Destruction we are presented with a bleak financial future. Even under optimum conditions the alternatives are not pleasant. Now let’s ask the $64,000 question: What will happen when interest rates start to rise? One needs to accept the fact that the world financial system rests upon an illusion. Fundamental balances and empirical realities have been masked for decades. Business relationships that produce real products and create intrinsic value are systematically penalized as interest rates are manipulated and currencies are crushed. All the time, there is one constant: The DEBT grows . . . Fiscal responsibility is dead. The age of hyper-inflation is the future. Cash was once king during a crash, but is no longer true. Today, the lessons of the past have been forgotten and the former proven rules to protect your wealth will not work. The worst of all times and the world hangs as the Sword of Damocles over the markets. Reversing the inescapable is impossible, that’s why it is inevitable. Before you dismiss this analysis as dangerous cynicism, the onus to provide an alternative how to service the debt rests with the critics. Surely, no rational person can conclude that government spending is stable. Deficits are dismissed as necessary and manageable. Prudence requires establishing a debt level that can be serviced without destroying the ability to conduct commerce. We are staring at an avalanche that will bury us when a critical mass of consensus finally admits that the furtherance in productivity, new technology and consumer demand can no longer support the ability to pay existing obligations. Unprecedented low interest costs are unsustainable. As rates rise the current debt becomes more difficult to finance; however, the real risk is that creditors will refuse to rollover the bond debt. Equity markets will crash, because the currency will be seen for what it has become—a promise to pay that can’t be met. Never underestimate the measures that the financial magicians will use to paper over the problem. A debt crisis based upon a geometric progression of tax revenue shortfall requires a currency devaluation. Historic foreign trade deficits, crazed escalating federal spending, housing prices that far exceed homeowner after tax income ability to afford, costs of household necessities that continually rise—all add to the public and private debt. Individuals are driven into bankruptcy, but governments remain intact even when they are insolvent. Sennholz is a brilliant economist. Nevertheless, his libertarian sacred cow is the fallacy that protective tariffs are always detrimental to the fiscal health of the world economy. Folks, this core issue is crucial. The most sincere and well meaning Free Traders, like Sennholz, don’t deserve to be in the camp of the Corp/State internationalists. The crowd that preaches the benefits of open trade are the culprits that created the debt bubble. This scholar of the Mises Institute contends:
Clearly, the Federal reserve is an artificial institution designed for placing and keeping Americans in economic slavery, but the notion that international trade conforms to a free marketplace is utterly absurd. Government deficits are caused by foolish policies that pander to obscene special interests and a demented guilt and a false sense of global responsibility. Public debt is a result of the functions of a deranged Socialism that has captured the culture of dependent serfs. Politicians grab power by feeding the hungry, while the marketplace of legitimate business transactions are tormented under the burden of regulatory altruism. How can the purchasing value of the dollar be preserved under this scenario? The way to judge tax rates is as a percentage of income. The true extreme inflation is the rise in the ratio of personal wealth transferred into the coffers of the State. When you add the fallen value in our currency to this equation, the net sum for each person is that our new abode will have a poor house address. Diminishing real returns on imaginary investments is the fate for savers as their wealth is systematically expropriated and intentionally confiscated. All the while the STATE carries on the business of protecting itself . . . We encourage advocates of the gold standard, because it places an external restraint upon corrupt Mattoids. But don’t expect that such a position solution will see the light of day. The demise of the US Dollar as the world’s reserve currency means that the chickens are coming home to roost. When foreigners stop holding Treasury debt the rush through the door will commence. They may even break through the windows to get out of a house consumed by an inferno of liabilities with no fire fighters left to put out the blaze. But don’t worry, you won’t own your home at that point . The mortgage will be called in, and refinancing options with Ditech will be over. Their sugar daddy, Citibank, just failed.
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©2004 by their respective authors. Reprinted by permission. |
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